Player stressed, so fans conclude he must be gay

Cincinnati Reds first baseman Joey Votto, the team’s best hitter, has been on the disabled list since May 30 with what the team has termed “stress-related issues.” The team and Votto have been vague about what is causing his stress, so that has kicked the rumor mill into high gear in Cincinnati. One popular conclusion? Votto is gay and the news was about to come out. This is the typical “I heard from a friend who has a friend with the Reds …” kind of stuff, which means it has zero credence but it is persistent. (Update below: Votto describes why he was on the DL).

I have been reading more than 100 comments posted on various sites about Votto and have seen the following reasons given for his stress:

  • He is gay and was about to be outed by his Canadian ex-boyfriend (Votto was born in Canada.)
  • He is bi and was about to be outed by his Canadian ex-boyfriend as part of a love triangle.
  • He is straight and broke up with his girlfriend.
  • He is straight, has a hot girlfriend but is still dealing with the death of his father last August.
  • He is distraught that Adam Lambert lost in the “American Idol” finals.

I made the last one up, but you can see how easy it is to propose any theory in the Internet age; anonymity allows anyone to pose as an insider.  The secrecy surrounding Votto’s absence has only heightened speculation, and Votto says that what he is dealing with is something the Reds have been aware of.

We’ll have a little conversation and come to a conclusion what I need to do next … They know what I’ve been going through. They would be able to say, ‘Are you ready to go?’ My answer would be yes.

Votto, batting .357 at the time of going on the DL, might be back in Tuesday night’s game in his hometown of Toronto, so whatever has been bothering him seems under control.

The “so and so is gay” meme has become commonplace (type in most any athlete + gay into Google and see what you find). I think this is a weird kind of progress. It was not too long ago that many fans denied there were gay players in pro sports. The acceptance of these rumors as being at least plausible shows that the average fan realizes that his favorite team might have a gay player.

Update: Votto held a 15-minute press conference after being called up prior to the Toronto game, where he said he was battling depression and anxiety attacks in the wake of his father’s death:

“They were overwhelming me to the point where I needed to go to the hospital on two separate occasions — once in San Diego and once that nobody had been told about, I went to the hospital in Cincinnati when the team was on the road [in early June],” Votto explained. “It was a very, very scary and crazy night where I had to call 911 at three or four in the morning. It was probably the scariest moment I ever had dealt with in my life, and I went to the hospital that night.”

“There were nights that I couldn’t be alone,” Votto said. “The one night I was alone, the very first night I was alone, was when I went to the hospital. I couldn’t take it. It just got to the point where I felt I was going to die, really.”…

“I do know I’ve had a real struggle with my father’s passing.”





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19 Comments on “Player stressed, so fans conclude he must be gay”

  1. #1 Mikeylito
    on Jun 23rd, 2009 at 3:36 am

    Maybe the problem is just that he plays in St. Louis.
    After all, isn’t this the same town that destroyed the psyche of Rick Ankiel who had to re-make himself into a servicable outfielder?

    We all have our personal demons.
    Votto is to be commended for not bringing his to work.

  2. #2 glando
    on Jun 23rd, 2009 at 3:53 am

    ummm, joey plays in cincinnati, not st. louis

  3. #3 Scott
    on Jun 23rd, 2009 at 6:09 am

    Funny. I read a few Rick Ankiel is gay rumors at the time of his colapse as well.

    Must be a St.Louis thing as you say.

  4. #4 Joe Guckin
    on Jun 23rd, 2009 at 2:20 pm

    Both Dontrelle Willis and Khalil Greene (Greene is with St. Louis now, heh) have been placed on the disabled list this year due to “social anxiety disorder.” Greene talked about it recently. http://tinyurl.com/lr2qv9 In his case it seems legit. Willis is another matter. He went on the DL, came back, pitched as lousy as ever, and is back on the DL ostensibly for the same reason. But he says any anxiety issues he has don’t affect his pitching. SI.com’s baseball writer says the Tigers put Willis on the DL because he refused to be assigned to the minors. The only reason he’s still around is because the Tigers are locked into a 3-year $29 million contract until 2010.

    No idea about what Joey Votto’s going through but have there been gay rumors about these other guys?

  5. #5 Pat
    on Jun 23rd, 2009 at 2:36 pm

    Well - if he is gay he should feel right at home this Thursday when the Reds play in Toronto when there will be a group affiliated with Toronto’s Pride Week in the crowd. And our seats are field level just down the first base line too within shouting distance of his first base position if he wants some friendly support. :razz:

  6. #6 Krishnan
    on Jun 23rd, 2009 at 2:40 pm

    Khalil Greene is a HOT blond BABE whom the Padres moved! Dontrelle has such a beautiful smile when he is going well and often times gets over-excited on the mound. Maybe they need to attend the Chicago Gay Pride Parade with Joey Votto and maybe we can help all three of them relax! :lol:

  7. #7 Krishnan
    on Jun 23rd, 2009 at 2:44 pm

    The REDS activated Joey for the Toronto series after doing well in a minor league rehab. His anxiety arose from an “inner ear infection”. ummmm… Joey, that is not where you are supposed to stick it… but as a newbie I guess anything cums and goes!

  8. #8 Pat
    on Jun 23rd, 2009 at 10:44 pm

    Votto did play tonight and held an emotional press conference before the game where he explained some of the emotional difficulties he’s been going through as he tried to deal with extreme depression. Twice he even had to call 911 and be hospitalized for help his anxiety attacks were so severe.

    From Canadian Press - In an emotional meeting with media Tuesday, Votto explained that he never really dealt with the difficulties of losing his father Joseph last August.
    He essentially suppressed his grief to get through the 2008 season and was “pretty severely depressed” over the winter until spring training began.

    At that point he managed to bottle up his emotions again to get ready for the new season, but when an inner-ear infection caused him some problems, it helped set off the problems that led to his DL stint.

    “They really hit me and they hit me 100 times more than what I’d been dealing with all off-season,” said Votto.

    He feels speaking to people has been therapeutic for him and with the help of doctors and some therapy, he feels he’s regained some control.”They really hit me and they hit me 100 times more than what I’d been dealing with all off-season,” said Votto.

  9. #9 Jim Buzinski
    on Jun 23rd, 2009 at 11:00 pm

    Thanks, Pat. I added an update to the end of the post based on Votto’s press conference.

  10. #10 rob dekoven
    on Jun 24th, 2009 at 12:32 am

    Khalil Greene has been quite open about his social anxiety disorder. And it’s remarkable how understanding his peers have been, as well as fans.

    Greene played here in San Diego and he had been quite unusual. No one outed him as gay, but there were thoughts that he is gay. While at Clemson, he was an art major. In San Diego, he didn’t date women, but was shy… In the off-season, he bought a home in the Florida Keys, a rather gay area. (When I was writing a column for our local Gay and Lesbian Times, I spoke with a Padres official about the “gay” player thinking it might be Greene. Instead, he mentioned the name of another player and had no reason to think Greenie was gay…

    Greene is heroic because he has defied the stereotype of the professional baseball player. It’s refreshing that he is so out about his SAD. He makes it that much easier for a gay player to come out….

  11. #11 DruggyBear
    on Jun 24th, 2009 at 1:45 am

    Khalil Greene gay? no way. no gay man would ever leave the house with hair that hideous!

  12. #12 buccoman
    on Jun 24th, 2009 at 9:18 am

    Not sure exactly how this connects, but I went through a period of intense anxiety/panic attacks. Went to the emergency room three different times thinking I was having a heart attack or stroke. All started about a year after my marriage broke up and the reasons (that I was gay) started to come out. Funny thing is that i was the main person telling people. Couldn’t stand any of the anti-anxiety meds, so I had to just learn to deal with it, which. for the most part, I have done successfully. Outing yourself, or being outed, can certianly produce emotions that cause anxiety; I know first hand. However, so can a lot of other major traumas cause anxiety.

  13. #13 RK
    on Jun 24th, 2009 at 11:32 am

    These pro-athletes are a joke. As I said in a previous blog, these guys do such a diservice to Gay men by hiding in their internalized homophobia and further put such a negative image. I do not know why Outsports is so sympathetic to them. I say out them if it is true and they will be enlightened and free. Some things are more important that batting averages. Give some credit to the fans as well. Yeah, they will hear some snide remarks, but that is part of sports just as long as the organization supports the player and let the public know they do not condone homophobia. Come out, come out wherever you are.

  14. #14 Mortimer
    on Jun 24th, 2009 at 12:17 pm

    So what. Gay or not, he gets the job done, right (well, not at the moment but when he is on the field, he’s good)?

  15. #15 BigBlueCowboy
    on Jun 24th, 2009 at 12:41 pm

    RK:

    What evidence is there that this man has internalized homophobia? The comments posted on other sites suggesting that Votto is closeted suggests that the posters are the ones who are homophobic.

    Votto stated he is suffering from depression brought on by the death of his father. End of story. I congratulate him for discussing his illness. Mental health issues are still burdened with stigma. As a professional, playing athlete, he is to be applauded for his frankness!

  16. #16 canmark
    on Jun 24th, 2009 at 8:29 pm

    Exactly. I see no reason not to believe the death of his father led to depression and some kind of anxiety disorder. And why do we have to associate troubled people with being gay? It’s unwarrented rumours like this that is probably forcing some other pro athlete deeper in the closet.

  17. #17 RK
    on Jun 24th, 2009 at 9:09 pm

    Bigbluecowboy:

    Whether Votto was Gay or not is not the point. If he is not then fine. But the comment was more general towards the state of closeted professional athletes or even entertainers. By hiding in the closet they tell the world they are ashamed of who they are. It is not acceptable to hide behind their career. By not being open they represent a form of homophobia which perpetuates stereotypes. Votto can be whatever and his mental illness is his to deal with. We as a community have to start holding closeted professionals such as athletes and entertainers accoutable for our lack of progress to defeat stereotypes, cliches, and derail equality for all of us. We all go through the process and being out means you are proud of the guy you are and in the case of atheletes and entertainers it gives younger Gay men role models. Remember, for everyone person that comes out represents one more blow to homophobia. These closeted athletes need to do their part.

  18. #18 santana
    on Jun 25th, 2009 at 1:13 am

    didn’t know there were gay rumors about joey. joey’s one of my favorite players. he’s a very good hitter. and he’s hot too. :)

  19. #19 TJ
    on Jun 25th, 2009 at 10:36 am

    Fellas, some people aren’t ready to come out. Why should they be forced or pressured to do so? Like Atticus said “you have to walk in a man’s shoes to really understand him”.

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