Greg McMackin
Matt Coin played tennis for UC-Santa Barbara and his 2005 article about coming out to his team is one of the most popular ever posted on Outsports. When he read that University of Hawaii football coach Greg McMackin referred to Notre Dame players doing a “faggot dance,” Coin was moved to write the coach. He was surprised he receive a personal reply.
It is possible that anyone writing McMackin (mcmackin@hawaii.edu) is getting the same reply, but Matt was still pleased that he received it. Here are Matt’s original e-mail (very well written) and McMackin’s reply:
Hello Mr. McMackin,
I am writing in response to the numerous articles I have read over the past 24 hours regarding the statements you made. As a former Division I tennis player for UC-Santa Barbara, I was personally offended by your use of the term, “faggot dance.” I think this reveals a larger issue among athletics, and can only assume that the words used on the field, at practices, in locker rooms, and closed doors are even more homophobic.
Diminishing a man’s masculinity has been common practice in sports forever. It is one thing to say that a man is “less of a man,” and another to say that a man is a “faggot,” “homo,” or “queer.” This implies that being a homosexual is a negative thing. If you feel that way, then you should keep it to yourself, and not create an environment that promotes your prejudice.
Comments like these encourage women and men to stay in the closet. Children around the country e-mail me everyday seeking counseling, and people like you are the reason they need it in the first place. Homosexuality is a natural thing, and it is likely that you have a homosexual brother, sister, uncle, aunt, son, daughter, or friend, who you love, but do not know is gay. It is your fault that this person can’t be his or herself around you. If you know 25 men, then it is likely that 1 of them is gay. I hope that this opens your eyes a little bit.
Since graduating from UCSB, the university has adopted an admirable diversity policy, and sends its athletes to training to better understand race, creed, and sexuality. I strongly suggest that you and your entire staff be sent to a similar training.
Thanks,
Matthew Coin
Matthew,
Thank you for your email. There was never any intention to use a word such as that. I am sorry for the mistake I made as it does not reflect the way I live my life. I believe everyone should be treated with dignity and respect. This painful and unfortunate situation will be used as an educational opportunity to promote better understanding of all people and emphasize how words do hurt even when no harm is intended.
Sincerely,
Greg McMakin
on Aug 6th, 2009 at 8:13 PM
Good that you guys posted this response. We should all cut the guy some slack. What he said was wrong, but there’s not a person here that hasn’t stuck his foot in his mouth one time or another. He’s been suspended. He has been apologetic. Let things lie.
on Aug 6th, 2009 at 11:23 PM
Matthew, what an incredibly written letter. I wish everyone could communicate as effectively.
As for the phrase in the response, “I am sorry for the mistake I made as it does not reflect the way I live my life.” Is this a true depiction of his lifestyle, or merely a canned response to get people off his back.
Granted we have all stuck our foot in our mouth, however, he is a Division 1 coach…he is routinely in front of the media, and should know that he is not only representing himself, but his program and his institution. The Division 1 programs I have been associated with put their athletes through a program about how to present themselves in public and in front of the media, maybe this coach needs a refresher class? I would be interested to hear if there are any athletes from Hawaii that have any interaction with this coach, and what they think of him.
on Aug 7th, 2009 at 2:15 AM
I agree, Wes. He really screwed up, but the coach’s reaction has been perfect, his apologies (after his first two non-apologies) have been sincere and I believe he wants to make amends. Even if he doesn’t want to, the school will force him to. We should WANT people like him and Tim Hardaway to redeem themselves because it shows the real movement of this issue in sports.
on Aug 7th, 2009 at 4:10 AM
I kind of agree with Fred. Having worked with a lot of Division 1 coaches, the response does not feel personal and feels somewhat similar to routine emails coaches send out to people to get them off their back. While I cannot say that for sure about McMackin, I personally do not buy this specific email.
on Aug 7th, 2009 at 10:15 AM
i am glad that he responded, even if it was a form letter. it shows that he is committed to reaching out to everyone who responded, and i think that is a good thing. i agree with cyd — that making amends shows the movement of the issue in sports, and people have to make mistakes in order to take steps forward.
at ucsb, we had to meet with our athletic department to discuss how we would present ourselves in front of the media, and we were only a mid-major tennis team. i imagine that a divion 1 football team gets a lot of coaching on this.
on Aug 7th, 2009 at 11:51 AM
I find it interesting that Matt does not state in his e-mail his orientation. Those of us who read outsports may recognize your name, but I expect the coach didn’t. I think that A) there is no need to state one’s orientation, and B) I’m curious if that would have affected the answer. I expect not.
on Aug 7th, 2009 at 10:24 PM
The Coach, as he said, should not have used that expression. People ought not to be demeaned for any disability they might have. Homosexuality is such a disability and homosexuals should not be mocked. But homosexual behavior should not have society’s approval.
on Aug 7th, 2009 at 11:45 PM
OK yar, you convinced me. Because of your brilliant blog post, I have decided to abstain from gay sex for life.
on Aug 8th, 2009 at 6:34 AM
That response seemed like a contrived public relations stunt.
Sure he made a mistake and apologized but come on, lets call it what it really is; a ploy so he can keep his job.
on Aug 8th, 2009 at 10:21 AM
At first I believed and accepted the apology, but I just listened to the actual recording and don’t believe for one second that apology is sincere. He is sorry he got caught. Listen to the recording, he thought it was the funniest thing ever, and kept repeating it to get a laugh. You were at a MEDIA event, of course it would be reported. If that is your best behavior while speaking to the media, what is your worst? Get a clue, you have embarassed your school and your players. You are a joke, and probably only got caught because you were attempting to slur ND, who like them or not, cream of the crop.
on Aug 8th, 2009 at 9:28 PM
I love sports apologies. Mostly all are written by lawyers or public relations experts.
on Aug 9th, 2009 at 11:27 AM
He said it. The room laughed. He said it again. The room laughed some more.
The part that seems insincere is he says “I am sorry for the mistake I made as it does not reflect the way I live my life. I believe everyone should be treated with dignity and respect. ”
Obviously before he got caught making these comments, he DID live his life failing to treat everyone with dignity and respect.
I’ll cut him slack if he were to say, “Yeah, I said those bad things. Now after all this hullabaloo, to keep my job, I’m keeping my eyes open and ya know…I think i see it *NOW*”
By denying that he could ever intentionally say something demeaning is….as Judge Judy puts it…”Pissing on my leg & telling me it’s raining”
on Aug 9th, 2009 at 7:09 PM
No harm in his comment? Really? How ’bout if he had called it a little jiggaboo strut? How would that go over?
on Aug 11th, 2009 at 11:54 PM
COACH MCMAKIN’S REPLY TO MY LETTER. GOOD FOR HIM.
Joe,
Thank you for your email. I believe everyone should be treated with dignity and respect and that is what I teach my team and my family. I was as shocked as anyone to hear that term come out of my mouth. This painful and unfortunate situation will be used as an educational opportunity to promote better understanding of all people and emphasize the importance of words and the harm they can do.
I am sure your dad is proud of both his sons. Thank you for your consideration in writing.
Sincerely,
Greg McMackin
To: mcmackin@hawaii.edu
Coach McMackin,
My dad was an All-American High School coach (after he was an All-State athlete in three sports) who ended up having two gay sons, and he, too, ended up changing his perspective on gay people. I appreciate your apology and statement saying that your words do not match your life’s work of coaching.
We all have our prejudices and this incident reminds me of some of the words that I use that might be offensive to others.
All the best,
Joe
on Aug 12th, 2009 at 10:03 PM
He may be sincerely sorry and wanting to make this an educational opportunity and so on, but this statement: “I was as shocked as anyone to hear that term come out of my mouth” — is the biggest bullshit line I’ve heard in years.