Openly gay former NBA player John Amaechi has dropped a bit of a bomb, telling the Daily Telegraph he would recommend that active professional soccer players stay in the closet.
I personally have spoken to 10, 12 current professional footballers who are gay, they exist, I promise you. As it happens none of them have asked me if they should come out. But if they did, I would tell them not to. I’m not a gay right activist. I don’t insist that they be a Joan of Arc. Why? Because that is what would happen: they would get burned at the stake. And how does that help anyone?
When asked if he was being a little dramatic, he said no.
Amaechi has long painted a deeply dire picture for openly gay athletes, but it’s the first time I’ve ever heard him say he doesn’t think they should come out. They’ll be burned at the stake? Even as hyperbole, there’s no evidence for that whatsoever. Thirty years ago, sure. But attitudes have changed, gay people can marry in England, more and more athletes come out all the time as pro-gay, the sports media is getting more welcoming of gay topics, etc…. There’s no questioning the fact that gay people are not accepted as equals in our society. But burned at the stake is a really strong overstatement, given how many active college athletes and former pro athletes have been warmly embraced.
Amaechi makes a GREAT point that we shouldn’t look to the gay athletes to force change, but it’s the leagues and teams — the power structure — that should be out front on the issues.
I think the mistake we make is that we’re looking at the footballers as if they are the problem. The FA framed the argument that because no gay footballer is brave enough to come out, homophobia will continue to exist. But it’s not the job of the minority to make the environment safer.
Amen, brother. In fact, about an hour before I read this article I was interviewed for a college thesis paper and said the same thing: Change needs to start coming more from the top.
on Feb 17th, 2010 at 2:19 PM
I see his point to a degree.
It would have been great for him to say; “It would take a very strong and courageous athlete to come out in today’s environment because there is the chance you’ll become a poster boy for gay rights.”
If you don’t have that kind of strength or have any trepidation about being true to yourself at this juncture, stay in the closet.
on Feb 17th, 2010 at 2:38 PM
Wait a second — not a gay rights activist? Geez, I guess all those HRC dinners and public appearances were only convenient when you were publishing your book, huh John?
on Feb 17th, 2010 at 2:48 PM
I read this article a couple of days ago and was extremely pissed off. It’s yet another example of how gay people insist on buying into a culture of victimization.
I absolutely disagree that the straight people are responsible for making things comfortable for gay athletes when gay athletes don’t want to do the work themselves.
I’ve said it once and I’ll keep saying it. If gay men don’t have the courage to stand up for themselves, then there will never be change. You can’t expect straight allies to take a shot on your behalf if you won’t stand up for your own rights next to them.
on Feb 17th, 2010 at 3:17 PM
I find it odd that he would tell someone to stay closeted. To me, the better approach would be to tell the athlete to do what he thinks best, to consult with loved ones, coaches, fellow players (to the extent possible) and come to the decision best for the athlete. Or better yet, tell an athlete: I support whatever you do, and if you do come out you will have no bigger ally than me. I really doubt that John knows the dynamic of an athlete’s situation better than the athlete himself.
on Feb 17th, 2010 at 8:48 PM
of course it would be nice if change came from the top, but when does that ever happen?
I can’t think of any minority group that was discriminated against that waited for the environment they were in to get safer before they decided to speak up for themselves
it takes a couple of brave souls from the minority to get the wheels rolling not the other way around
on Feb 17th, 2010 at 8:49 PM
encouraging people to stay closeted, is not gonna bring about change
on Feb 17th, 2010 at 8:53 PM
i don’t think you should tell people to come out either, it’s up to them, but i don’t think it would be that horrible for an athlete to come out especially not an american athlete
of course there would be shock and a few idiots would make some hateful and downright stupid comments ala tim hardaway but look what happened to tim when that crap poured out of his mouth
on Feb 17th, 2010 at 9:48 PM
As I have said before “John Amaechi is a coward.” I say this since he could not come out when he was a active player.
on Feb 17th, 2010 at 9:55 PM
It will never get better untill people know they are out in the sports world. Waiting to come out after years of just taking the abuse isnt worth the troubles athletes go through. Sitting around having to hear people speak of someone like you like your a dog sucks. John needs to rememer what it was like not eing able to be himself
on Feb 17th, 2010 at 11:34 PM
Mike, I have to take issue with your statement about Amaechi: how is he a coward? He’s telling it like it is in the environment of professional sports. I’ve never been in a professional sports lockerroom, he has and I assume he knows what he’s talking about when men are there to act like men, not gentlement at some afternoon tea party with their wives.
on Feb 17th, 2010 at 11:38 PM
Thinking about it for about a minute, I’d rather hear from all these high school and college kids coming out while still playing than a mediocre-at-best ex-NBA player whose post-retirement coming-out managed to coincide with a book deal.
on Feb 18th, 2010 at 10:30 AM
I think that John is entitled to his opinion, but I certainly don’t agree. Personally, I think NOW, in the 21st century we must encourage our professional, college, and high school athletes to come out…We need to make changes for the next generation, and not continue on the status quo!!
Both John and I stayed in the closet, as the times were different when we were in professional sports. However, they are different now and we should encourage not discourage our community….
on Feb 18th, 2010 at 11:24 AM
Change for gay rights and equality must be driven by gay people. Anyone waiting around for the hetero powers that be to effect change simply because it is the right thing to do will be waiting forever.
Look at any struggle for human rights throughout history. The movement has to be lead by the people seeking equality. Of course they can’t do it completely alone and will need the help of other groups. But the oppressed group must lead the way.
on Feb 18th, 2010 at 11:40 AM
My point in agreeing with John (and I think his as well) is that we can’t do it alone. Gay people are standing up for themselves; It’s not like we’re staying quiet.
A few years ago I asked every NFL team if they had same-sex domestic partner benefits. The response I heard more than any other: “No one’s asked for it.” It’s the dilemma we’re talking about: Should an athlete or staff member have to ask for these benefits to get them enacted, or should employers behave like a majority of Fortune 500 companies and offer them without being asked?
on Feb 18th, 2010 at 11:47 AM
I like John Amaechi, but the fact remains that he didn’t come out until AFTER he was done with NBA, and as a result he NEVER actually experienced what it was like to be an openly gay professional athlete while actually participating in his sport. Because of this (and I really don’t mean this as any disrespect to him) I’m not really sure I’d buy into any advice he’d give to “active” professional athletes as far as coming out, because quite frankly this is something he doesn’t know a whole lot about…
on Feb 18th, 2010 at 1:30 PM
Sometimes all it takes is one person coming out and the acknowledgement from upper management that it’s ok to help ease the fears for others.
At least that’s what I take from the courageous Brendan Burke… by coming out and having his father, Brian, publically support him was a huge step in the right direction.
Together – both athletes and management – can help change the face of homophobia in sport.
on Feb 18th, 2010 at 3:24 PM
I agree with Greg. John has taken a lot of money from gay orgs like HRC. And he encouraged everyone to buy his book. NBA Journeyman hypocrisy = BIG FAIL.
Outsports is a form of activism because it changes minds. Why is activist considered a dirty word? Jesus was an activist. Buddha was an activist. I guess Don Amaechi could be considered a fear and shame activist.
Meanwhile, considering that there was a photo of John and his Penn State boyfriend posted on to the old Outsports message board years ago, (which no one forwarded to the media by the way) I wonder how much he was actually in the closet. And considering the monetary factor, is he afraid that he will no longer be the “only out” gay athlete. I’m sure Gareth Thomas has already cut into his speaking engagement hustle. I say keep quiet if all you can do is promote your own agenda.
on Feb 18th, 2010 at 5:00 PM
Hmm, I agree it’s a ‘Top Down’ and ‘Bottom Up’ affair…and I’m an activist.
You can scream and cry and kick but until the top people-WITH the power-do anything…it’s same old same old…
Anyhow, Amechi seems REALLY conservative anyhow and somehow, I don’t think Gareth Thomas is….I think he’s left to the centre..
And as an English bloke? The football league in the UK is VICOUS.
But it pays to keep Amaechi and Max Clifford in work if you have closeted sports players.
on Feb 19th, 2010 at 12:05 AM
Wacko liberals now foam at the mouth…
on Feb 19th, 2010 at 4:54 AM
“And how does that help anyone?”
Makes it easier for the next person. Those who integrated schools weren’t treated so well, but it’s still good that they did it.
on Feb 19th, 2010 at 8:26 PM
It’s up to the individual, but no one here is certain that a popular athlete coming out in the NBA or NFL wouldn’t be a target for discrimination or harassment. No one knows.
It would be great for the movement, but great for the athlete? That’s less certain.
What is certain is that homophobia exists in sports to a much greater degree than in many other fields. No one is a coward because they don’t want to subject themselves to harassment for the good of the gay cause.
on Feb 20th, 2010 at 2:15 AM
I’m extremely disappointed in these opinions. People should be encouraged. You think when the first black man was in baseball, it was easy? The only way it will get better, is to take the lead. The cost be damned.
Just like someone mentioned when schools had to be integrated. Yelling “change is hard” is a piss-poor, lazy attitude. Sure, you may want to wait a while for things to get slightly better. But things dont’ get better by waiting. Things get better by doing it.
To any gay athlete reading this, come out already. You’d have my immortal support. Additionally, it’s the only way anything will change. You can’t hope for miracles; you have to make them.
on Feb 20th, 2010 at 4:45 PM
I agree that Amaechi is entitled to his opinion, and I agree that it should be up to the individual, but if gay people (esp. high profile gay athlete ‘leaders’ like Amaechi) are not supportive, is it any wonder athletes are afraid to come out.
It’s interesting that we read more and more on Outsports of gay college and high school athletes, or athletes in the ‘smaller’ sports or playing in lower level leagues–we read about these people coming out on a regular basis. It’s remarkable how these people have been able to show a higher level of courage than some of the older and more experienced professionals.
I think we should let these prospective gay athletes know that they will be supported and will help them. Because in the end we all benefit every time a gay person (in any occupation) comes out and shows themselves to be an upstanding member of society.
on Feb 21st, 2010 at 1:17 PM
Jackie Robinson wasn’t burned at the stake.
on Jan 17th, 2012 at 7:09 AM
Brilliant suggestion!
I appreciate John Amaechi for his wonderful thoughts would be helpful for the athletes to stay in the closet. Thanks for excellent bit! 