She’s also reached some comfort in sharing her bisexual orientation, which she kept hidden in high school to avoid being singled out. Jessica came out to her ATT teammates with little fanfare (“When they found out, they treated me just the same,” she said) and for the last year, has lived with her girlfriend, who wholeheartedly supports her fight career.

“I don’t put it in any titles,” said Aguilar, “but I’d say when I’ve found the right person — whether it’s a man or a woman — I’d be happy.”

Like fighting, Jessica’s bisexuality is something her mother doesn’t quite grasp. Mother and daughter haven’t talked about it since Jessica first told her a few years ago.”

She asked me where I learned it or saw it,” Jessica said. “I told her you didn’t see or learn it; you felt it. She told me it would pass.”

Aguilar is 14-4 and hasn’t lost in over 18 months. With her win last weekend, she became the Bellator Fighter No. 1 Strawweight in the world. Congratulations to her all the way around!

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Dixon, of San Jose, has only one focus: to complete a remarkable comeback from a career-threatening Achilles tendon tear last year.

“I’d rather be known for what I can do gymnastically than focusing on being an openly gay athlete,” he said this week by phone from the U.S. Olympic Training Center in Colorado Springs, Colo. “I couldn’t care less.”

As I’ve chatted with Dixon since the Outsports story was released, he’s reiterated over and over his dedication to training. He understands the importance of him reaching the Olympics, not just a bunch of media hits between now and then.

This quote from him to the Merc made me smile:

“There is now that role model position to uphold,” Dixon said. “In my mind I still have a lot to prove to myself and to the national governing body that I belong on the national team.”

Only one way for him to prove himself: And only focus and training can do that.

The life of the story reminds me of Matthew Mitcham. The Australian diver came out about the same time — a few months before the Olympics — four years ago. Interest was strong, but after his performance at the Olympics he exploded onto the scene. If he gets to London on the USA Gymnastics team, sky’s the limit for this very driven young man.

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Megan Rapinoe (Photo by: Jerome Miron-US PRESSWIRE)

U.S. star women’s soccer player Megan Rapinoe, who will be on the Olympic team, answered “we’re out there” when asked when a high-profile player would come out. It was a rather novel way to answer the question. Here is the appropriate part from a video interview with Rapinoe on KickTV (video below):

Q: Do you think we’ll see a high-profile soccer player coming out?

Rapinoe: Hopefully, hopefully, I think that obviously we’re out there. It’s weird. [On the women's side], it’s accepted with the teams and within the sport but it seems as if sports is that last institution of homophobia. In all other professions, there’s plenty of out professional around but for some reason sport isn’t that way. … It’s sad there’s that there’s still thick homophobia in sports.

Rather bizarrely, the interviewer never follows up on what would be a nice scoop for him. He simply ends the segment. AfterEllen quickly added Rapinoe to its list of its 12 favorite out athletes from the last 40 years, saying:

While many speculated (and hoped) that Rapinoe was gay, she did not address her sexuality before this week when she stated “we’re out there” when speaking about gay athletes. Hopefully we’ll be able to watch her excel on the field and continue to be a voice for gay rights off of it.

“We’re out there” is pretty definitive and I echo what AfterEllen said. Quick web searches find Rapinoe linked to fellow player Abby Wambach (Zimbio even has 14 photos of Rapinoe and Wambach together, definitely making a link), so people clearly have been speculating.

It was also enough for one YouTube commenter, who joked: “it sucks that’s she is lesbian. there goes any mathematical chance i might have had.”

The gay question comes around the 5:20 mark:

Here is a cool photo of, from left, Megan Rapinoe, Marian Dalmy, Abby Wambach and Sarah Huffman during batting practice before a game last August between the San Francisco Giants and San Diego Padres. Photo by: Kelley L Cox-US PRESSWIRE)

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The Stanford grad took a big step toward that goal at the U.S. Men’s Qualifier on Saturday in Colorado Springs, finishing second overall out of the 72 competitors. He also tied for wins in two events: floor exercise and high bar. It was a game-changing come-back performance for Dixon, who tore his Achilles tendon last spring.

Now Dixon is talking about his personal life and sexual orientation publicly for the first time. Like charging at the vault, he’s coming at it at full speed.

Dixon and his two sisters were all adopted at birth by Michael and Kathy Dixon. While the three children were born at different times, they share the same birth mother, whom none of the family has ever met. It was through his sisters that he first discovered gymnastics.

The Dixon household was diverse: Josh is half-black and half-Japanese, while his father Michael is white and his mother Kathy is Japanese.
Maybe it was the multicultural household he grew up in, but Dixon never felt his early crushes on boys were wrong. Still, he didn’t talk about those crushes because he was immersed in gymnastics from the time he hit puberty.

“Eat, sleep, train and do homework,” was the extent of Dixon’s life. “Gymnastics was my number one priority, and if something got in the way of that I had to push it aside.”

The mantra was reflected in his interview with Outsports. When asked about gymnastics, he could rattle of incredibly detailed accounts of his scores and performances. Questions about his personal life were more of a struggle for him to answer.

The focus on his sport has paid off. In high school he was a four-time member of the USA Junior National team, placing second all-around at the 2006 Visa U.S. Championships. His Stanford team won national championships in 2009 and 2011. In his senior season he placed seventh overall at the NCAA Championships. He is a seven-time All-American. By the end of his college career he had accomplished most of what he wanted to do in sports.

All that’s left is an Olympic gold medal. On Stanford’s Web site, Dixon said his ultimate ESPN highlight would be “seeing a U.S. men’s gymnastics team win an Olympic Team Title.” He doesn’t just want to see the highlight; He wants to be part of it.

Still recovering from his Achilles injury, Dixon moved to the Olympic training center in December 2011, along with five other gymnasts. The training has paid off so far, with his strong finish on Saturday. The next hurdle for Dixon is the Visa Championships, June 7-10 in St. Louis. The top 15 finishers at that meet then go on to the Olympic Trials, June 28-July 1, in his home town of San Jose. From there, six men will be chosen to represent the United States at the London Olympics.

Even as he gets closer to his Olympic dreams, and his focus narrows more than ever on his training and competition, Dixon is ready to talk about his sexual orientation.

In his sophomore year at Stanford, one of his best friends on the gymnastics team at the University of Illinois came out to him. Dixon reciprocated the revelation; Instantly, they had a mutual support structure with another gay collegiate athlete.

When he started exploring his sexuality in his junior year, he quickly learned he wasn’t the only gay male athlete at Stanford, as he was soon dating another varsity athlete. When some members of the gymnastics team noticed Dixon was spending a lot of time with one particular friend, Dixon said they were quite comfortable bringing it up.

“Who’s this guy you’ve been hanging out with?” One of them asked.

Josh told them he was dating the other male student.

“Oh that’s cool,” was the response.

What was particularly cool to them was Josh’s willingness to share that very personal part of his life with them. Word spread quickly through the gymnastics world. “A lot of guys in the gymnastics community talk,” Dixon said.

When he arrived for training in Colorado Springs last winter, his suitemate asked Dixon if the rumors were true.

“Oh that’s cool,” was the response.

In fact, Dixon said he has not had a single negative response “in any way, shape or form.” If anything, the only homophobia he has encountered has been from within himself. He acknowledges he once felt internal pressure about being a gay man in what some label the “gay sport” of gymnastics. He didn’t want to fall into a stereotype. But he’s come to embrace it, and he says his sexual orientation now makes him stand out more at the elite level. While he stands out, he isn’t the only one. Dixon knows of at least three more gay gymnasts still competing in college, and he says he is not the only elite-level American gymnast who is gay.

One concern that remains is the judges. Gymnastics is one of only a handful of Olympic sports hand out medals based on the scores of judges. While some claimed figure skater Johnny Weir’s perceived sexual orientation hurt him with the judges in the 2010 Winter Olympics, it certainly did not play a factor when Matthew Mitcham posted the highest-scoring dive in Olympic history in 2008.

When asked about the timing of this article and how it may affect his performance in the eyes of the judges or Olympic selection committee, Dixon had no fear.

“This would never affect how I’m judged or my position on the U.S. Olympic team,” Dixon said with confidence and conviction.

The number of out male Olympians, retired or otherwise, is miniscule. Only a handful of Americans have come out publicly after their last Olympics: Most notably Greg Louganis, Johnny Weir and Tom Waddell. Only two American men we know of were ever out publicly at the Olympics: Divers David Pichler and Pattick Jeffrey. Matthew Mitcham and Johan Kenkhuis have been recent openly gay male Olympians, representing Australia and the Netherlands. There has never been a publicly out gymnast in the Olympics, male or female. Ji Wallace, the trampoline gold medalist in 2000, came out after he competed.

So what are Dixon’s chances of making history as the first out American gymnast at the Olympics? It will depend on how well he and the other gymnasts perform at these next two big meets. If his performance on Saturday was any indication, he’s got a great shot.

You can follow Josh on Twitter.

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Derick White

By Derick White

I’ll get right to the point.  My name is Derick White and I am a former collegiate head coach.  I am also gay.  I remained in the closet for my entire coaching career because of one simple factor –  fear.  I will explain this in more detail in a bit, but that fear kept me from having the kind of career I would have liked to have experienced.

My upbringing was typical for a young kid in the Midwest.  Unconditional love from my military father and stay-at-home mother, outstanding support from my grandparents and great-grandparents, and a close bond with my brother and sisters.  I was lucky to have such great relationships.  But I knew that there was something different about me that I didn’t understand.  It took me until I was 29 to finally admit what that was — I was gay.  But in that time, I learned a lot about myself and just how strong I could be.

Life in high school was perfect on the outside.  My list of accomplishments and honors read like the type of resume any university would be crazy to turn down.  My life was great at first glance.  I was a friendly, outgoing, thoughtful and caring person.  I was that person who always aimed to please.  I knew I had a good life – who wouldn’t want to be the Homecoming King?  But under the surface, things were crashing down all around me.  Divorce, death and health issues in my family.  I didn’t know how to deal with these struggles and heartaches, so I ignored them.  And it worked …  temporarily.

Once college began, I immersed myself in so many activities and clubs that I didn’t have time to think about the hurt I had been experiencing.  I was so unhappy with myself and continued to hide it.  I played baseball at Missouri Southern State University and my teammates became my second family.  We spent so much time together at practice, games, weights, class, meals, bars and parties that they probably knew me more than anyone else.  But they still only knew a sliver of who I was.  My life was in a downward spiral, but this time I was doing it to myself.  I was the one that was supposed to be controlling my life but instead I had given up on myself a long time before.

Once I graduated with my degree in 2006, I took a position with my alma mater in the housing department.  Over the next year, I really worked on myself and finally was pleased with how things were going.  I started to make some changes and was feeling much better about myself and my future.  I knew I wanted to get back into athletics, I just wasn’t sure what route to take.

Photo by Laura Lewis

I accepted my first collegiate coaching position in 2007 at NCAA Division I University of Missouri-Kansas City as an assistant volleyball coach.  I had played volleyball growing up and had been coaching at a high school close to my hometown.  I was very lucky to have been given the opportunity to coach at such a high level for my first college job.  I made the move and began working immediately.  I loved coaching, the school, the athletes, the staff and the city.  It was a perfect match for me.

With the move, it allowed me to explore things about myself that I had always repressed.  I was so far inside the closet, I wasn’t sure how to meet people.  That was when I discovered several Internet sites (such as Craigslist) that made meeting other guys who were gay, bi or curious much easier.  I made a lot of mistakes and used some poor judgment on occasion. I was naïve and a bit too trusting at times, but I learned from those experiences. Luckily for me, I got out of those situations with no consequences for my actions.

In 2009, I accepted a head coaching position at Missouri Valley College, a smaller, private college in the middle of the state.  I continued using the Internet to meet people, but was much more careful in how I went about it.  I met someone within the first month of my new position and we started a relationship that would last for 15 months.  Neither of us were out, so it remained a secret for the duration of that time.  He lived about 2 1/2 hours away, so we got together whenever we could.  Things didn’t work out in the end and we both went our separate ways.  I had two other relationships during my time coaching at the college, but was never out to my athletes or department.  Not until now, that is.

I told my immediate family that I was gay in July 2011. I wanted to tell them all at the same time so I sent them an email.  I know it was very impersonal, but I wanted to be able to tell them everything that was in my heart and not leave anything out.  I was nervous to give them the news, especially my father, who had retired from the military and was very conservative.  I worked on the email for two days and finally with some strength I hit the “send” button.  Within minutes, my brother called me and told me how proud of me he was.  I was immediately in tears.  Before I awoke the next morning, I had heard from my sister and both of my parents.  All were very supportive and reassured me that they loved me no matter what.  A tremendous amount of weight had been lifted off my shoulders.  Since then, every person I have confided in has been great about it.  I am so lucky to have such amazing people in my life.

I resigned from my position at the college in late January.  I was offered a position with a pharmaceutical/healthcare IT corporation in Kansas City that I could not turn down.  I miss coaching tremendously (it was a very hard decision to make), but it was a decision that needed to be made for my future.  My partner Brad and I are looking to start a family and this new position will make that easier both financially and personally.  The new position is where he lives, so we will be able to be together full time and look toward a future family together.  It will also allow me more opportunities to continue my existing modeling and acting career, which is something I love doing.

Many factors contributed to my decision to keep quiet about my sexual orientation until now.  For many years I was ashamed of being gay.  That shame then turned to fear.  And I allowed that fear to run my life until I took action. It allowed me to finally felt joy and acceptance, not only from my family and close friends, but also from myself.  The biggest obstacle that I encountered in this journey was me … it just took me a while to discover this.

I wish I could have had the courage to speak out while I was still coaching at the college level.  Comments made by some administrators and parents made me believe that it would be in the best interest of the programs for me to remain silent.  I now realize that was ridiculous.  I was contributing to the whole situation I should have been fighting.  Yes, I was a gay collegiate head coach.  Did that have anything to do with my skills or abilities as a coach?  Not at all.

My only regret is that I would have chosen to live an open life during my coaching career.  It would have been a challenge within the athletic department, but it would not have hindered me from doing my job and winning games.

I’m sure there would have been some backlash from some of my athletes and their parents, but as a coach, I am used to others not liking or agreeing with some decisions.  The only difference here is that this was not a “decision” that I made for myself.  I am proud of who I am and who I have become as a person, leader and coach.  I hope that my former athletes and mentors would agree.

Since leaving Missouri Valley, I have not heard much from anyone at the school.  A couple of my players will text or contact me on Facebook me, but nothing from the administration, other coaches or faculty.

I have formed solid bonds with Nick Clark and Kirk Walker (two coaches that I reached out to after reading their stories on Outsports) and have the utmost respect and admiration for them as both coaches and people.  They have both been very instrumental to my progress in coaching and also in my personal life.  Kirk has been a great sounding board for me and is always willing to listen when I need an ear.  He also has no problem beating me soundly in a friendly game of Words With Friends (he is cut-throat!). Nick and I have developed a great relationship that all started with our love of volleyball.  We actually coached against each other a few years ago in the same conference and I am so proud to see what his career has blossomed to.  Both are great individuals who are wonderful advocates for all in athletics.

I am eager to find different ways to get out there and do my part to combat homosexual prejudices in athletics as well as in our communities.  I am always refreshed when I read about others doing their part and I am ready to take more on my shoulders as well.  Nick and I were texting a couple days ago about how I wanted to find some stuff that we could do together or separately.  Blogs, videos, appearances, whatever I could do to help others out there (no matter what age or career) that are in the same boat as I was.  If you have any ideas or connections, I am up for suggestions.

The reason I am coming forth now isn’t for any recognition or praise.  I am doing this so that other athletes or coaches can know that they are not alone.

I know of other closeted coaches out there and for so long I was playing the same part. But I know now how much I let fear overshadow the truth. My advice is simple: If you expect your athletes to give you everything they have, you must do the same in return.  If you are dealing with issues in your own personal life, your coaching will suffer.  Be fair to yourself and your athletes by giving them everything.

I hope that others can learn from my story and gain support in knowing that they have someone out there that has their back.  I know how much that helped me.  If there is anything I can do to help spread the word and provide support, please do not hesitate to contact me.  No matter what anyone tells you, it does and it will get better.

Derick White can be reached via email at derickwhite@hotmail.com or on Facebook.

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“Standing in front of 400 children and their parents in a genie outfit is a lot more nerve-wracking than running out against the [New Zealand] All Blacks at the Millennium Stadium,” Thomas said.

“Ten years ago it is not something I would expect to do but it’s an opportunity to take a step outside my comfort zone.”

Thomas will be performing “Aladdin” in what is known as “panto,” described as “a peculiarly British tradition of winter musical comedy theater.” The show will be held in December.

Since coming out as gay two years ago while still playing, Thomas has seen his public profile soar. He was invited to last year’s royal wedding, finished third in the British “Celebrity Big Brother” and is having a movie made about his life. “The film’s going well,” he said.

Thomas said that Micky Rourke still hopes to play him in the film, despite doubts about the actor’s physical fitness. Thomas’ business partner Gareth Williams told Wales Online: “They [the film’s producers] have actually confirmed they want Tom Hardy involved, and maybe Jason Statham as well.”

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Rick Welts (Photo: Kyle Terada-US PRESSWIRE)

A year ago, Rick Welts was known only in the NBA world as an executive with the Phoenix Suns. Then came a front-page story in the New York Times in May, where he came out as a gay man and his world changed. He suddenly was seen as a positive force for change in a sports world still rife with homophobia.

Now the president of the Golden State Warriors, Welts reflected on the past year in an interview with Mark Emmons of the San Jose Mercury News, and the news has been nothing but good.

“It probably wasn’t as hard as you might think because I had this amazing group of friends and family who embraced my entire life,” Welts said. “It was just this one part of my life that I kept quiet because I did fear what the consequences would be if I shared that. Maybe it was somewhat of a burden, but it’s not like I had this tortured life.”

Welts left the Suns and moved to the Bay Area to be with his partner, flight attendant Todd Gage. He had no intention to going back to the NBA, but was offered the job by an ownership fully aware it was hiring a gay man. Joe Lacob, one of the owners of the Warriors, remembered their interview when he brought up Welts’ New York Times story:

“I felt like not mentioning it would almost be as bad as making too big a deal out of it,” Lacob said. “I wanted to acknowledge it, talk about the reaction and then move on. I respect him for what he did, but it’s just not a relevant issue with doing the job. And you cannot find a negative reference on Rick Welts.”

Welts says he is often asked about when a pro athlete will come out and his reply that it’s eventually going to happen.

“It’s going to be much more heroic than what I did,” he said. “It’s just a different set of circumstances that an athlete would be facing. But I think we’re on a course where that’s just going to be inevitable.”

It’s been great to see Welts embrace being a role model, which was going to happen once he came out. It’s also great to see an ownership that will judge Welts about his performance in his job, not his sexual orientation.

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Dave Kopay started paving the way in the '70s

Slate.com asked its readers to predict when a professional male athlete in the United States will come out of the closet. The average: October 2014. The most common guess was June 2013, with the majority of voters saying it will be by the spring of 2014. Either way, their readers think it’ll be in the next two years.

While most of the attention in the last couple weeks has been on gays in the NHL, it’s Major League Baseball where a plurality of voters think that player will be. MLB got 47% of the vote…almost half. The NHL was a distance second with 24%. The NFL was last with 11%, just behind the NBA’s 17%.

While some people may say “that’s way too late” because of the recent advances in sports, I personally voted for June 2016. We’ve seen these “watershed” gay moments in sports before, after which athletes were supposed to come streaming out of the closet. Dave Kopay came out in 1975 thinking a wave of athletes would follow him. He’s still waiting, 36 years later. The Gay Games launched in 1982; Nothing. Billy Bean came out in 1999 and that was supposed to change things. Laveranues Coles revealed he was sexually assaulted as a child, and Mike Silver said that would open the closet doors. That was 2005.

Interestingly, the third most-common guess in Slate’s poll was March 2020, eight years from now.

Other people say it will “absolutely” happen in the next year, others say two years. It could happen tomorrow; The thing is, no one knows and no one can predict it. But I’m not holding my breath.

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Sunil Babu Pant in Nepal

The story of Nepal’s first “gay Olympics” got a lot of attention from the mainstream press this week:

• The Wall Street Journal:
  “Welcome to South Asia’s Most LGBT-Friendly Country” – this may well become the new motto for Nepal, which is set to host the region’s first sports competition for the lesbian, gay, bisexuals and transgender community. 
• Huffington Post:
  Almost 15 years later, Nepal is a new country today. With changed political leadership and social reforms, the country once known for its mountains and the Maoist conflict is now recognized for its gay rights movement.
• The Telegraph:
  Nepal is a conservative, Hindu country which nonetheless has some of the most progressive policies on homosexuality in Asia. A landmark 2007 court ruling ordered the government to enact laws guaranteeing the rights of gays.

Various pubs (particularly in Canada) also gravitated to young hockey player in Canada Scott Heggart, who came out:

• The Edmonton Journal and Ottawa Citizen:
  But as a young athlete, steeped in the machismo of sport, where “about the worst thing” is to be a “fag” or a “homo,” there was one conversation that was even harder. Telling his teammates he was gay.
• CafeMom’s The Stir:
  I wish that every time we heard another horrible story about a gay teen who was bullied to the point of suicide or kidnapped in the night and sent to a behavior modification “boot camp” we could immediately hear about a kid like Scott Heggart.
• Ottawa Citizen has a good follow-up:
  He told his parents he planned to post one video each day for the next year as he documented his experience of coming out as a gay jock. He hoped he could work out his anxieties anonymously online, as well as solicit support from others who had already walked this path. ”Our reaction was total fear because the Internet can be a scary place,” says Julie.

And we had some Outsports mentions this week:

• The New York Daily News article on Tim Tebow:
  Cyd Zeigler, an editor at Outsports, a gay-oriented sports website, sees more to it than that. Tebow’s ties to evangelical Christianity and Focus on the Family, which deeply opposes marriage equality and gay rights legislation, has left him deeply suspicious of the Jets’ backup quarterback. “As a member of a group that has been persecuted by the Christian church for so long, he is hard to take,” Zeigler said.
• The Daily News also mentioned us for an article about the lesbian couple engaged at an Ottawa Senators game:
  They may have not been the first couple to get engaged at a sports game, but one Canadian couple’s sweet moment at an Ottawa Senators game is going viral around the Internet.

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“I still remember team huddles where [players] would say ‘Let’s beat these faggots up’ or ‘We can beat these guys because they’re a bunch of faggots,’” Fautley said. “It’s hard to get amped up for a game when, right before you walk on the court, you hear something like that.”

Fautley was close to a breaking point after a 12-day winter tour through Europe, where he ate, slept, trained and travelled with the team. Before the trip, he was distant from his teammates — now he resented them.

“When someone says a homophobic slur and you’re in the closet, you have no grounds to say anything, so you take it,” he said. “Not only do you take it, but you remember it in your head, and it compounds.

If anyone tells you that casual homophobia doesn’t have an impact on gay athletes, they should read this article. And if the occasional homophobic slur would drive an athlete to leave a team, imagine the impact of having a coach continually call you a sinner and say you should face discrimination!

You can follow Bryan on Twitter.

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