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Ring Of Honor

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At approximately 3:27pmET on Sunday, the NFL season was halfway over. Fitting, I think, that the season's midway point should provide such great insight into so many teams.

HERM EDWARDS, YOU'RE FIRED

That's what I'd do if I had the power to do so. The New York Jets coach has become brilliantly inept at managing a football on game day. Against the San Diego Chargers this Sunday, the Jets had the ball at first and goal from San Diego's three yard line, down by five points with 1:40. In my Chelsea hovel, I'm telling my bf that "they've got to just run it four times. But, this coach will screw it up."

I'm no Nostradamus – I simply have a decent memory. I can remember watching Herm Edwards hand the other team a victory when they so very much deserved defeat.

I wasn't surprised to see him run the ball on first down. It was no gain for Curtis Martin. No big deal. You've got three more plays. All they have to do is average one yard per play. Again, I wasn't surprised to see the Jets pull out a fade pattern to Lavernues Coles on second down. I wasn't surprised because it was a stupid call and we've all come to expect that from them. The play was broken up. I also wasn't surprised to see QB Brooks Bollinger throw a pass on third down (that was batted down at the line) because it was a terrible call. Same reason. On fourth down, it was then too late to run the ball. Edwards actually surprised me here because he DIDN'T run the ball; I figured he'd screw that play up to. And, he did. Another fade pattern – this time to Justin McCareins against the other team's best cornerback. Another ball knocked away.

Edwards has certainly been there when the Jets have won games. And some big games. But, this guy is simply going to coach his team to defeat at least once or twice during the season when the players deserve victories. If the Jets keep him around, it's because they're not trying to win the Super Bowl, they're just trying to make the playoffs every year.

TERRELL OWENS & RANDY MOSS: FUTURE TEAMMATES?

As I was getting my back adjusted this morning, my chiropractor and I were talking about whether Terrell Owens could land on another team this season when the Eagles cut him. I think it's unlikely because a couple things would have to be at work. 1) The team would have to be desperate for a wide receiver; 2) They'd probably have to be in playoff contention; 3) They'd have to be willing and able to pay him a boatload of money, 'cause God knows he wouldn't sign for anything less; 4) The team would have to be willing to take a mountain of criticism from their own local media.

One of the teams that could benefit from having him is the Minnesota Vikings, but they couldn't possibly handle #4 at this point.

Honestly, the four teams I see as most likely future homes for T.O. are all in the AFC West, the number-one being the Oakland Raiders. Owner Al Davis would kill his mother  to have Randy Moss line up opposite Owens. And besides, they're already the most dysfunctional organization in the AFC (I'd like to say the league, but Minnesota and New Orleans probably have a leg up on them in that department). What would a little more infighting be?

MY TOP FIVE FOR JANUARY 2nd

1) Indianapolis Colts. Jinx. Jinx. Jinx.

2) New York Giants. They got nine home games this season and they're playing inspired football now. That's one thing that no other NFL team has and something else that few have.

3) Jacksonville Jaguars. It's simple math. Have you seen their remaining schedule? Other than a home game against the Colts, they don't play a team that's better than 3-5 the rest of the season.

4) Cincinnati Bengals. They're not winning pretty, but they're winning.

It's all blurry after those four right now.

"YOU'RE NOT THAT GOOD"

I find it humorous that people in my football league are still saying that about the team I'm on, Philip Marie. After this past weekend, we're 6-0 and have outscored our opponents 218-54. That means the average score of our games has been 36-9. This past weekend, we put together the best offensive game of any team this season, putting up 49 points. It was also my personal best performance (and that's one of our basic tenets) in this league, with four touchdown catches.

I'm having a blast this season not just because my team plays so well together, and not just because I like the people on the team, but because the team is so low-stress. We don't practice. We never have. We get one email a week from our captain, Alon. Every weekend we just show up, play our asses off and win.

But, we're not that good. So, I guess we're just lucky. Hey, I better go play the lottery!
 

--The Indianapolis Colts whipped the New England Patriots, 40-21, Monday night to finally get a giant weight off their backs. It was Peyton Manning's first win in New England after seven losses and the first time his team beat Tom Brady's. The Pats had been 4-0 against the Colts the past two seasons.

Manning was brilliant throwing three touchdown passes and controlling the game against a weakened New England defense. The Colts are 8-0, the two-time champion Patriots 4-4. New England should still win the AFC East by default and I wouldn't be surprised to see the two teams meet again in the playoffs, but this time it would be in Indianapolis.

--I'm starting to get the feeling that the Patriots are a bunch of sore losers. Tom Brady left the post-game podium without taking questions (Manning has always been stand up, win or lose). And Pats Coach Bill Belichick made a ridiculous replay challenge after the Colts made the right call to go for two in fourth quarter with a 40-21 lead to try and go up by three touchdowns and three conversions; stranger comebacks have happened. Geez, they have owned the Colts the past three years, the least they could do was be a bit more gracious in a loss.

--Ed “Guns” Hochuli gets more attention than any other NFL referee, in large part because of his impressive build. As he wrote to one blog this year: “I have never used steroids, growth hormones, or anything like them. I work very hard at maintaining my physique.” Hochuli got more than he share of attention, both at the game he did Sunday and one he did not. He also added to our list of Phil Simms homoerotic comments. 

Simms was calling the Pittsburgh Steelers at Green Bay Packers with partner Jim Nantz and the camera focused on Hochuli ready to make a call wearing a long-sleeved shirt with temperatures in the mid-40s. 

Simms: “You know, it must be cold out there today, colder than we think. Ed Hochuli is wearing long sleeves."
Nantz: “You seldom see that. … A lost chance to see those impressive biceps.” 
Simms: “I hear ya. If you got ‘em, show them off.” 

--Hochuli was also on the minds of Fox announcers Tim Ryan and Ron Pitts, calling the Seattle at Arizona game (thanks to Outsports photog Brent Mullins for this note): 

Ryan:  “Walt Anderson is one of the best officials in professional ball.  He does a really good job of keeping the crew in line.”
Pitts:  “You know what?  Walt's been in the weight room.  See?  Look at his arms!  He's trying to do that Ed Hochuli thing.”
Ryan: “Is he?  I see he's got them pumped up a bit!”
Pitts: “That's starting to permeate through the officiating crews.” 

--Hochuli is starting to get some mainstream attention this year (we've always been fans). "When the locker room door opened and we walked out onto the field, I always felt like Superman coming out of the phone booth," former ref Jerry Markbreit told the Palm Beach Post last month. "Well, Ed not only feels like it, he looks like Superman."

Even the players notice. "That dude is jacked up," Miami Dolphins fullback Heath Evans said of Hochuli. "Guys always wonder, 'Does he want to ref or play?' "

--No guts, no glory rang true in two NFL games and illustrated something about the coaches involved. 

The most celebrated call of the weekend was in Kansas City, where the Chiefs trailed the Oakland Raiders, 23-20, and had the ball at the Raider
1-yard line with only 5 seconds remaining. The conventional call would have been to kick the almost-automatic field goal and head into overtime. Or, if deciding to go for it, to have the quarterback try and throw a quick pass, that if incomplete would still allow a second for a field goal.

Chiefs coach Dick Vermeil did neither. Knowing he has one of the game’s top offensive lines, Vermeil played to his strength and sent running back Larry Johnson up the middle. Johnson hurdled the line into the end zone and the Chiefs had a dramatic win. 

``Wow! I was scared. I just figured I'm too old to wait,'' said Vermeil, 69. ``If we had not made it, then you guys (reporters) would have had a lot of fun with that. It was not an impulsive thing. It was the right thing for us to do.'' 

Vermeil’s call was the glory part. San Diego’s Marty Schottenheimer was in the no-guts category. His Chargers led the New York Jets, 28-20, and faced 4^th-and-goal at the Jets half-yard line with 8:49 to play. Chargers running back LaDainian Tomlinson had already scored four touchdowns, including two easy ones from the 1. Give LT the ball and let him put the game out of reach; even if he failed, the Jets would still have to go 99+ yards. 

But Schottenheimer played it safe, preferring to go up 11, not an insurmountable lead. After the field goal made it 31-20 Chargers, the Jets returned the ensuing kickoff to the Chargers’ 48 and wound up scoring a touchdown to make the score, 31-26. They got the ball back on a San Diego fumble and drove to the Chargers’ 3 with less than a minute to go. Four plays failed to get a touchdown and the Chargers held on by the skin of their teeth. 

The decision to kick the field goal is eminently defensible by coaching standards, but there are times when you have to throw out the book and go for it. Making the Jets drive 99 yards with an inexperienced quarterback was the worst outcome had the Chargers decided to eschew the field goal. The best outcome would have put the game out of reach.

This is one reason why Schottenheimer’s teams have a history of regular season success but post-season failure (5-12), and why Vermeil has coached two teams in the Super Bowl.  "There's an old saying Schottenheimer said in defending his call. "You never go broke making a profit." Yes, but you never hit the jackpot playing by just playing it safe.

--There seemed to be a “make-good” call in the Cincinnati Bengals at Baltimore Ravens game by referee Jeff Triplette.

In the third period, the Ravens were denied a touchdown when an official inadvertently blew a whistle while Ravens safety Will Demps was running back a fumble. '' It was an error,'' Triplette said of the quick whistle. '' By rule, there is nothing we can do.''

In the fourth quarter, the Bengals had a Carson Palmer-to-Chris Henry touchdown pass overturned on a replay. The only problem was that no way did the replay show conclusive evidence that Henry failed to catch the ball. It was more likely a case of Triplette trying to square the account. The Bengals moved to 7-2 with a 24-9 over the 2-6 Ravens.

--The call that drives me most crazy is when teams throw the ball short of the first-down on third or fourth down. Best example Sunday came when the Lions’ Joey Harrington threw a 4-yard pass on third-and-7 against the Vikings. Why not just punt on third down if that’s the best you can come up with?

--Another dumb play quickly going up the charts is the fake spike by the quarterback. Such a play killed the Packers against Cincinnati last week, and a similar one hurt the Eagles in their 17-10 Sunday night loss to Washington.

The Eagles were down 10-7 near the end of the first half but had driven to the Redskins' 24, well within field goal range. The clock was running and Donovan McNabb looked to spike the ball. But, for some bizarre reason, he faked it and was sacked for a seven-yard loss. The clock kept ticking and the half ran out.

--At 4-4, the Eagles are in last place in the NFC East and now have an uphill fight to even make the playoffs. What a comedown for a team that has been the NFC's best over the past five years.

--Hottest player I saw Sunday was Cincinnati receiver Kevin Walter (right), 6-3, 214, in the mold of Ed McCaffrey. 

--Looks like the race in the NFC South will be between the Carolina Panthers and Atlanta Falcons, each 6-2. The Panthers spanked the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, 34-14, dropping Tampa to 5-3 (1-3 in their last four games). The Bucs’ offense has been nonexistent since QB Brian Griese got hurt and the remaining schedule includes six teams that now have winning records.  

--You know a team is predictable when the announcers call the play before it happens. The Miami Dolphins were trailing the Atlanta Falcons,17-10, and had the ball third-and-2 at the Atlanta 8 late in the game.

The Dolphins came out with both running backs Ronnie Brown and Ricky Williams in the backfield, obviously designed to make the Falcons think a run was coming. But the Fox announcers mentioned that every time the Fins used that formation earlier in the game a pass was coming. Miami didn’t fool Fox or the Falcons as Gus Ferrotte threw into double coverage with the result being an interception.  

--They’re not the Monsters of the Midway but the Chicago Bears have won four in a row and have a two-game lead in the weak NFC North. The Bears kicked a late field goal to beat the New Orleans/Baton Rogue Saints, 20-17, on Sunday. The four opponents in the winning steak have a terrible 10-23 combined record, but Bears fans won’t complain. Up next is another cupcake, 2-6 San Francisco. 

--The 6-2 Seattle Seahawks are another team that has won four in a row, and like the Bears are feasting on an easy schedule; their last four opponents have a combined 10-23 mark. 

--In contrast to the easy skeds for the Bears and Seahawks has been the slate faced by the San Diego Chargers. Of their nine opponents, only two (the Jets and Raiders) have losing records and the Bolts played both those games on the road.

The Raiders have also had it tough, playing six teams with non-losing records in their first eight games.

--You won’t hear much from me about the Terrell Owens suspension. The Eagles Sports Programming Network, aka ESPN, will give you updates on the hour and half-hour and in between and probably deliver bulletins to your cellphone. Memo to the network: There are other teams and players in the league. 

--My Top 5:

1. Indianapolis (8-0).
2. Pittsburgh (6-2)
3. San Diego (5-4)
4. Denver (6-2)
5. Cincinnati (7-2)