I am no fan
of the Colts, but I'll be cheering for them this weekend.
The Steelers have always come across to me as a bunch of
pompous jackasses. After their game at Cincinnati, which was
won because the Bengals had to rely on Jon Kitna, two
players had this to say:
“No one
expected we could win the game if we had to pass the ball.”
That was Ben Roethlisberger. Really? No one thought
you could win if you had to pass the ball? First, that's
absurd. Second, you didn't win because you "had to pass the
ball" - you won because Carson Palmer didn't play.
"Who dey?
Who dey? We dey." That was Larry Foote, mocking the
Bengals' rally call this year. Yeah, you da guys who won on
da second defensive play by your guy who rolled over on
Carson Palmer and knocked him out for da game.
Why are you
trash-talking after winning a game marred by the
disappointing injury of the game's biggest star?
Go Colts!!!
Charge a timeout
With 8:45
left in the first quarter, Redskins linebacker LaVar Arrington
intercepted Chris Simms and ran the ball back to
within the Bucs’ 10-yard line. There was a fumble at the end
of Arrington’s return, but he was ruled down by contact.
That is a non-challengeable play. Yet, Bucs coach Jon
Gruden threw his red challenge flag, which stopped the
clock for about 60 seconds. Coaches that challenge
non-challengeable plays should be charged a timeout. I’ve
seen this a few times this season where a coach throws the
red flag on a non-challengeable call to buy some time.
Because the rules say he only loses a timeout if he loses
the challenge, the team gets to keep their remaining
timeouts. It’s time to start punishing coaches for abusing
this system and for not knowing the rules: you challenge a
call you can’t legally challenge, you lose a challenge and a
timeout. Until the NFL institutes this, coaches will
continue to abuse it.
Kill Pepsi Machine
If I drank
Pepsi, I’d stop. The most
asinine commercial, which hits every single NFL game, is
the ridiculous spot featuring a Pepsi machine as one of the
New England Patriots’ wide receivers. It seems
Bill Belichick’s bad taste in clothes isn’t as bad as
the team’s taste in business opportunities.
What a difference a year
makes
The Colts
have eight Pro Bowl starters. The Patriots: zero.
The Three Chuckleheads one
last time
The
Three Chuckleheads from ESPN’s Sunday Night Football are
worth listening to only for their insipid comments. On
Saturday at the Redskins-Bucs game, in their last broadcast
together, Paul Maguire may have had the best comment
of them all. Bucs quarterback Chris Simms threw a good
40-yard pass into the endzone that was dropped. Said
Maguire: “This young man threw the ball as well as anybody
in the history of the National Football League.”
Vince Young
Vince Young
declared his intention to enter the NFL draft this
April. Smart move for the kid; his stock could do nothing
but go down next year. I gotta say, I’m not impressed with
his attitude. He was a sourpuss when he lost the Heisman
Trophy to Reggie Bush (as well he should have).
After beating USC last week, apparently he kept asking,
who’s the Heisman now? Ugh, well, it’s still Reggie Bush.
And, despite how much he wants to be the number-one pick in
the draft, he’s not going to be; that’s going to be Bush as
well. With the right team, I think Young could be a decent
quarterback. But, so many of these quarterbacks who dazzle
us with their feet in college go south in the pros. In my
mind, Young is a poor man’s Michael Vick.
I now get the Eagles fans
I can’t
take Michael Irvin anymore. He’s a loudmouth,
know-it-all who’s all style and absolutely no substance. He
props up his friends and goes after every quarterback he can
sink his teeth into. I can understand why the Eagles fans
cheered when he got injured years ago.
Kenny’s kids
While
Kenny Mayne was
Dancing with the Stars, his daughters took over his
segment for the week. This one involved asking New York
Giants defensive end Michael Strahan if he lost
his front tooth and how he felt about Brett Favre handing
him the all-time single-season sack record. Too bad Kenny
got eliminated in week one of the show – I’d love to see
what other NFL players his daughters take to task!
Enough with the flailing
already!
It seems
that the ridiculous flailing of the right forearm at the end
of a route has become part of every route that doesn’t end
in a completion. Every receiver who has a defender within
five yards of him starts lobbying the officials for a flag
before the ball even hits the ground, and it just looks
ridiculous. Receivers in the NFL seem to have become
whiners. I say, shut up and catch the damn ball.
Playoff prediction
Just as
last year, this year’s divisional round is entirely
comprised of matchups that happened earlier in the season,
with three of them taking place in the same city. The home
team won every one of the first four matchups. This time
around . . .
New England at Denver
The New
England Patriots are going to get killed this weekend in
Denver. This game so reminds me of the Baltimore Ravens’
run the year after they won the Super Bowl. In the wild card
game, they traveled to Miami and spanked the Dolphins,
20-3. The Dolphins had a great defense that year but little
offense. The Ravens, much-hyped after that win, went into
Pittsburgh and lost, 27-10.
We’re
going to hear “look out for the Patriots” for the next five
days as though the Denver Broncos didn’t win 13 games and
didn't win one of the two toughest divisions in the league.
Not only have the Broncos scored more points than the
Patriots, but they’ve allowed 80 fewer points this season.
They’re 8-0 at home and haven’t allowed over 21 points a
single time in Denver. The Broncos ran over the Patriots for
178 yards in their week-six meeting in Denver, a game the
Broncos led, 28-3, before the Patriots started a nice but
futile comeback. Their first meeting: Denver 28, New England
20. My prediction: Denver 27, New
England 17
(Note:
It is entirely possible that the "Curse of the Buzinski"
is alive and well and that him winning the pool we're in if
Denver wins will undermine the Broncos; so, take my
prediction with a grain of salt.)
(Jim
note: Cyd is correct. I have terrible football/betting
karma. If I was alive and rooted for the Allies in WWII,
Americans would all be speaking German and wearing kimonos.)
Pittsburgh at Indianapolis
Carson Palmer’s torn ACL on his
first pass on Sunday was the greatest gift the city of
Cincinnati has ever given to Indianapolis. If Palmer doesn’t
go down, the Steelers don’t win. But, he did and they did.
Does this mean the Steelers are blessed or that they just
aren’t that good? I think a little of both.
The
Colts, however, are just good. Peyton Manning and the Colts
have won their last two playoff games at home – both against
the Denver Broncos. Are they breathing a sigh of relief that
they don’t have to think about the Patriots? You bet your
ass they are. Their first meeting: Indianapolis 26,
Pittsburgh 7. My prediction:
Indianapolis 30, Pittsburgh 16
Washington at Seattle
That win in
Tampa Bay was completely predictable, though the way the
Redskins won wasn’t. Chris Simms just isn’t that good,
folks. The ‘Skins’ defense came in with a chip on its
shoulder and Sims and the Bucs’ offense paid for it. They
will NOT be able to do that against the Seahawks. Seattle
has a terrible record in the playoffs. Last year, they
choked at home against the St. Louis Rams; the year before,
they choked in overtime against the Packers. The determining
factor as to whether they go to the Super Bowl or not will
be whether Shaun Alexander is still hungry after
winning the League MVP and rushing titles. For this game,
though, it won’t matter. Their first meeting: Washington 20,
Seattle 17. My prediction: Seattle 24, Washington 9
Carolina at Chicago
I
won’t even try to fake it – I have absolutely no idea what
will happen in this team. I’ve already heard that “Carolina
is going to win the NFC,” while few people are giving
Chicago a prayer of doing so. I will say this: the last two
playoff teams they played in the regular season (Chicago and
Tampa Bay) they lost to by a combined score of 33-13. Their
first meeting: Chicago 13, Carolina 3.
My prediction: Chicago 20, Carolina 16
--My picks for next weekend’s game
before diving into the weekend that was:
AFC
New England (11-6) at Denver (13-3):
Since I am going to pick the Broncos to win, I want to make
one thing clear to Tom Brady – I really, really
respect you. You are the greatest quarterback
playerathletemale human being to ever
walk the Earth and my life has been immeasurably enriched by
your presence.
That
said, I think Denver has been the better team this season
and has the most favorable matchups. The Broncos are
unbeaten at home and went 7-3 against teams with winning
records. New England went 4-6 against winning teams and only
its win at Pittsburgh could be considered quality. Never
count out the Pats, but I think they fall this week. Broncos
27, Patriots 20.
Pittsburgh (12-5) at Indianapolis (14-2):
The Colts are lucky to not be playing the Pats in their
first playoff game after having five weeks since a
meaningful game. Pittsburgh is tough and resourceful but the
Steelers’ can struggle defending the pass and passing is the
Colts’ offensive strength. In addition, Colts coach Tony
Dungy has never lost a home playoff game. I just can’t see
Pittsburgh keeping up with Peyton Manning. Colts 31,
Steelers 16.
NFC
Washington (11-6) at Seattle (13-3):
The Redskins looked pathetic on offense in beating Tampa
Bay, setting an NFL record for fewest yards gained (120) by
a winning team. Unlike the Bucs, the Seahawks have an
experienced quarterback with Matt Hasselbeck and the
league’s MVP in Shaun Alexander. This will be a blowout.
Seahawks 30, Redskins 10.
Carolina (12-5) at Chicago (11-5):
The Bears won their first meeting, 13-3, by sacking Jake
Delhomme eight times (though never tearing his pants off).
But the Panthers are 4-0 in NFC playoff games under John
Fox, including three wins on the road. This will be a tough,
low-scoring game, but I’ll go with the experienced QB to
lead his team to a last-second field goal. I picked the
Panthers to reach the Super Bowl in preseason, so will stay
true. Panthers 13, Bears 10.
--I went 2-2 in the wild card round,
getting New England and Carolina right and missing on
Washington and Cincinnati.
--The AFC is so superior that the two
conference finalists from a year ago – Pittsburgh and New
England – are road underdogs. In contrast, the NFC is so
weak that of the four semifinalists, only Seattle made the
playoffs last year. Washington would be lucky to win six
games in the AFC, while Kansas City and San Diego (also-rans
in the AFC) would be NFC royalty.
--I
listened to all three hours of Phil Simms
and heard nary a homoerotic comment. Bummer! But I did like
this exchange between Simms and fellow CBS announcer Boomer
Esiason, as reported in the Los Angeles Times. They were
previewing the Tampa Bay-Washington game, which featured
Brunell, a veteran, and Chris Simms (photo), making his
first playoff start and Phil’s son:
Esiason: "You have one quarterback that's learning how
to play in this league and another who has been through the
wars before. But I like the quarterback at home [Chris
Simms] because he's tall, left-handed, blond and
good-looking. So I'm going to stick with him."
Simms:
"You cannot relate to any of that, can you? [At least] the
good-looking part."
--It sucked to see Cincinnati Bengals
quarterback Carson Palmer go down on his team’s second
offensive play with torn knee ligaments. It was the key play
in the game won by Pittsburgh, 31-17. The Bengals rallied
behind backup Jon Kitna for a half and led at one point,
17-7. But Kitna then showed why he’s a backup, throwing two
interceptions in a dismal second half as the Bengals once
again became the Bungles. On one play, the Steelers rushed
only two players, Kitna had 13 seconds to throw and he wound
up tripping over his own feet and fumbling.
--Palmer went down
on a hit by Kimo von Oelhoffen that was not dirty, Von
Oelhoffen played six seasons for the Bengals and looked
genuinely stricken as he saw Palmer writhe in pain on the
field. "It was just a sickening feeling," Palmer said.
"Because I knew what it was and that my season was over."
At first, some Bengals were furious at von
Oelhoffen, thinking he had taken a cheap shot. "They were
upset, obviously," Von Oelhoffen said. "They just lost their
best player. …I can't say it didn't affect me. That kid
deserved to play in this game."
--Palmer finished the game
1 for 1 for 66 yards, the longest completion in Bengals’
playoff history. For Cincinnati fans who waited 15 years for
a playoff game, it was a bittersweet record.
--It’s
obvious that the Steelers and Bengals don’t like each
other. There was a lot of pushing and shoving and talking,
and Bengals coach Marvin Lewis even took a shot in his
postgame remarks when asked about Palmer’s injury. "To sit
there and baby and cry like their quarterback did –
ridiculous," said Lewis as he stalked out of the news
conference, It was a reference to Steelers quarterback Ben
Roethlisberger, who complained that Cincinnati linebacker
Odell Thurman hit his knee during the team’s Dec. 4 game won
by the Bengals. We love a catfight!
--The
best play of the weekend came from the Steelers when
they had the ball at the Bengals’ 43 leading 21-17 late in
the third quarter. The snap went to wide receiver Antwaan
Randle El, who rolled to his right, taking almost the entire
Bengal defense with him. Randle El then threw back across
the field behind him to Roethlisberger, who had about a year
to throw. He launched one to a Cedrick Wilson, who was so
open that CBS’ Phil Simms yelled “touchdown!” as soon as
Roethlisberger let go of the pass. The Steelers led, 28-17,
and the game was effectively over.
--Bengals
receiver Chad Johnson took time before the game to go
out and greet tailgating fans. Pretty cool and one reason
why he is so refreshing; he also has a terrific smile.
--I
spent a lot of time
on the Steelers-Bengals game since it was the only one of
the weekend even remotely interesting. The other three were
generally dull and is one reason that watching the regular
season with the NFL satellite package often trumps the
playoffs. Three of the four road teams won and for the
second year in a row, both NFC home teams fell.
--Washington
didn’t beat the Bucs as much as the Bucs lost it. The
Redskins scored one touchdown on a fumble recovery, had
another on a 5-yard drive after an interception and were
lucky when Bucs’ receiver Edell Shepherd dropped the
game-tying TD late in the Skins’ 17-10 win. "It's
unfortunate," Tampa coach Jon Gruden said. "He was open, he
had his hands on the ball, and he was in the end zone."
--Washington
quarterback Mark Brunell was hideous, going 7 for 15 for
41 yards and an abysmal 25.7 QB rating. In contrast, New
England’s Brady had a 116.1 rating, while Roethlisberger was
a sterling 148.7 (a perfect rating is 158.3).
--All
four games featured first-time playoff quarterbacks
against veterans. The “rookies” lost three and Palmer got
hurt in the fourth. The Giants’ Eli Manning actually had a
better rating (35) than Brunell, but his team lost 23-0 and
he threw three interceptions and lost a fumble.
--The
Giants turned in the worst effort of the weekend.
Manning was bad, Tiki Barber was non-existent, but the
biggest no-shows were the Giants defenders. The Panthers ran
for 223 yards and controlled the clock for 42:45. In the
regular season, the Panthers finished near the bottom in
rushing and averaged only 104 yards a game. They had that
amount at halftime against the Giants.
--New
England’s 28-3 win over Jacksonville was the
least-surprising result of the weekend, though I had
expected a closer game. The Jags looked totally lost against
Brady and Coach Bill Belichick, even though the Pats led by
only 7-3 at half. The key play turned out to a be
third-quarter fumble by New England deep in Jaguars’
territory that was recovered by Pats receiver Andre Davis on
a heady play. The Pats scored a touchdown a few plays later
and the route was on.
--I’m
seldom amused by commercials but I did like the one from
Sony for its high-def TVs that used an old electric tabletop
football game set to the play-by-play from the famous 1982
Cal-Stanford game. That was the game that Cal won on a
wacky, last-play kickoff return that featured Cal players
running through the Stanford band.
--I
listened to all three hours of Phil Simms